Follow Your Dream
by Clare bear 48
Summary: From Where the Heart is... What Sully was feeling when he arrived in Boston


**Follow your Dream  
**

By Clare Quinn

**Disclaimer I do not own the characters in this story. I wish the people who did would use them and give us another film to mark the 20****th**** year anniversary.**

Michaela had received a telegraph from Rebecca requesting she travel to Boston. Her mother was dying from a tumour in the liver according to the great Doctor Cook. Nobody doubted or questioned him, as he was the most eminent doctor available. Thus Michaela had arrived with her new family to her family home in Boston.

Michaela and her children from Colorado Springs just did not fit in from the moment they entered Michaela's mother's sick room. Her sisters did not want her questioning or interfering in the treatment she was receiving, thought to be the best available. Her condition was what they all expected.

Mrs Quinn had informed her other daughters on her return from the frontier of the primitive conditions their youngest sister Michaela now chose to live in: A one roomed hovel. It was made of wood slats and plaster and was drafty when the wind blew. Curtains were the only partition between the small cramped rooms, leaving little or no privacy what-so-ever. Another abomination was that there was absolutely no indoor plumbing nor running water of any kind, something Elizabeth considered as essential. Barrels of water stood on the side walls and that crucial requirement was bragged up from a creek in buckets. She also reported that Michaela had savages as neighbours and nursed slaves in her bed. Her sisters had never heard of anything so scandalous and it was a good job their friends didn't know. They then heard she had a family of waifs in tow as well. Mother seemed to have taken to the children though something the sisters could not understand as their Mother had ideas much more strict than necessary. They often heard her stating in her starch laced voice, "Children should be seen and NOT heard."

...

In the mean time Sully had a nagging feeling of utter loneliness since Michaela and the family...his family had departed in such a hurry for Boston. He should have gone but he had not been invited. Now he was seated with his best friend and even that did not give him much comfort as he watched the sparking ember waft smoke up into the blackened sky. He could not even discern one of the night sky's star constellations that usually comforted him.

Cloud Dancing asked what had troubled him and when he answered "Dreams," his wise friend had led him to understand what was truly disturbing him. From the moment Sully had put his arm around Michaela and witnessed her vulnerability he'd been totally lost. His resolve just to be her friend has swiftly turned into becoming her protector. Sully had been in denial of the intense love he had been experiencing for Michaela for some time. It was an immense fear that he was unworthy of such a beautiful, intelligent woman. He had tried just to remain her friend but watching her cry over the thought of losing her mother his heart burst and his resolve had melted like a chip of ice that had fallen from the ice box on a hot day.

Sully began to travel the width of the country as his heart finally over ruled his head. He was placing his whole future on a whim, to see her and tell her how he felt. He could no longer control his feelings, nor was he able to deny them any longer either. He'd missed their evening talks on the porch although he had thought he'd never feel close to another human let alone a woman ever again. He missed them all: Brian and going fishing with, Matthew and Colleen... How could this have happened? When had he begun to see them as his family?

To afford the travel Sully sat on the roof of the coach and had not eaten at the way stations, when the other passengers sat down for their meal. He had chewed through the toughest of dried meat, and the small stale biscuits were no better as they were as hard as wood.

On the train he had agreed to ride in the baggage carriage to save some of the fare. Again he would forgo meals just so he could arrive as soon as possible to see Michaela. He was trying to ignore the strange sounds emanating from his stomach, he had been hungry before. In the army the rations were meagre, the Indians never had enough food, so this was such a little thing. He could live without food for the short time until he could see her.

Finally he arrived at his destination; he knew her address as it was on the telegram he had sent to her about the Indian Detoxification Remedy. She had also left it scribbled on a piece of paper just in case he needed to contact her.

At last oblivious of the strange sight he made as he just pushed his way out of the large railway station trying to calm the flutter he now felt in the pit of his stomach. Breathing out he tried to quieten down his nerves and that little voice in his head telling him he was here in the same city as her, making his heart race that little bit faster.

Gasps of horror and women putting nosegays tied to her wrist against their nostrils suddenly made him aware of the state he was in. Going into the men's area he tidied up as best he could. He didn't need much hence he had brought as little as possible with him, set only on one course: to get here as quickly as possible. Looking into the cracked discoloured mirror he saw the growth of his beard. He shrugged, knowing Michaela had seen him in a far worse state than the image staring back out at him.

Heaving himself out of the large intimidating, iron and glass building, with the crowds of people, smoke, steam and the chaos Sully stood shocked. The outside of the noisy railway station there was no relief from the mass of human throng all wanting to get to their destination.

He had thought it would be relatively easy to locate Mike's home but the sight of the town just outside the station reminded him that this was a big city. Instantly he disliked Boston and the people in it. They were rude and pushy as he tried getting a porter to direct him and a woman yelled, "What about my luggage?"

Sully was on a mission now, following the directions the porter had instructed him he walked through the streets that became more and more grandiose with each step. Unheeded he had an aim, and that was to win her heart.

Finally he stood in awe of the red brick house Michaela had grown up in, a place that had been her home until she had moved to the frontier. He knew she was from money but he had underestimated the extent of the wealth she was used to. This only made him admire her more that she had converted his shack into a home for her and the children. She had never complained that things were too hard, chopping wood, fetching water and baking. Now it was obvious to Sully that it had never been a mean feat for a refined woman who was a doctor to accomplish such tasks.

Wiping his sweating palms down the sides of his buckskins he ascended the brick stairs to the impressive polished wooden carved door, taking the ornate shining brass door knocker. He banged it against the door and stepped back to wait.

The door was finally opened by an older man dressed in starched livery, his face as un-giving as his dress. Raising an eye brow at the image of a bedraggled human being he waited.

Sully's mouth went dry when he tried speaking. Coughing to get the sound out he asked to see Doctor Michaela Quinn.

The man's face became sterner as he bared Sully by standing in the door frame saying, "I am sorry. Sir, the family is busy at the moment."

Sully felt his heart lurch when he heard some laughter coming from inside. He was sure he recognised Colleen's shriller than normal giggle. Narrowing his eyes he stepped up the step and squeezed past the astonished butler.

The butler spluttered never having a ruffian enter the house,

"Stop! You can't go in there."

Sully, his heart pounding and his head hurting, dashed towards the jovial sounds. Turning into a heavily curtained room he was affronted with sounds and smells the like he had never envisaged. He had been so eager to see Michaela again that he had just barged into a full dining room.He'd not grown up with the knowledge of decorum. The butler Harrison tried to explain but Sully wasn't listening, "You have to be announced."

His heart and head were now in turmoil. His heart saying, _stand your ground,_ his head screaming _turn around and run_. Then in all his confusion he first heard the children in unison say. "Sully." Followed by Michaela's. "Sully".He had not recognised Brian, Matthew and Colleen immediately, seated at the heavily laden table, its white damask table cloth, shining silver candelabras, with white dripping candles, the spotless fine china and crystal. This was a family banquet and he had barged into its midst, neither invited nor announced.

At that precise moment he saw her. Michaela looked like heaven. She was dressed as he has never seen her before, the red satin dress with black lace trimming the red and black feathers in her hair looked stunning. The image took his breath away. Her travelling outfit when she had arrived in Colorado Springs was fine but nothing compared to how she looked right at this moment.

He had heard the rude comments about his attire since arriving at the station. But he had only had one thought on his mind and one purpose: to see her face. The face he'd been seeing in his dreams since her hasty departure weeks ago.

Again he was oblivious to the gasps of horror and comments from the table and the other surprised occupants. He registered briefly the children had remained seated, not jumping up to welcome him as was their normal habit, especially Brian's. They were seated like many statues on the pave walk he had just passed since arriving.

As suddenly as this all occurred, in a heartbeat his head registered this was a family, her family and he was an intruder on a private meal. Michaela was surprised to say the least. She was there with the family: her sisters Marjory, Claudette, Maureen and the oldest Rebecca and their families. Her new friend Doctor William Burke was sitting beside her.

"_Oh my goodness what have I done?"_ his mind cried out. He was ready just to turn and run.

Michaela saw the look on his face like a cornered animal but offered no assistance to him. She had not had eye contact since she looked up when he entered the room. Sully was wondering if she was embarrassed at his appearance, although he logically knew she had seen worse.

"Mister SULLY!" Elizabeth's surprised utterance silenced the buzz at the table. The sisters looked at each other as they had heard their mother speak of him and Michaela's new children after she had arrived home from her visit to Colorado Springs.

"Won't you join us?" Elizabeth offered always the correct polite hostess.

Harrison had hastily placed a chair for him to her left, next to Brian and opposite from Michaela's whose brow was still deeply furrowed, her eyes remained down cast, meanwhile Fiona set a place on the table for him.

Sully sat and looked at the crisp starched napkin on the plate surrounded by a shining silver napkin ring, unsure what to do with it until a maid took it and placed it on his lap before a plate of food was placed in front of him.

The delicious smell and look of the cooked food made his mouth water. Because he was so ravenous he used the fork a few times before he picked up one bean after another, gulping the food down as quickly as possible, ignoring the silver cutlery on either side. Sully was oblivious of the stunned silence that had enveloped the table. Brian sat stock still waiting for some comment as he and his siblings had been lectured continually since arriving about table etiquette. The boy was sure that Sully did not know what was expected in the present company. No elbows on the table, eat with the correct knife, fork or spoon, chew with your mouth closed and never ever speak with food in your mouth.

Elizabeth broke into the ensuing silence once again after observing Sully's starving behaviour, at the back of her mind remembering telling Michaela he was a savage, suddenly taking pity on him. "You must be famished after your long trip, Mr Sully. After making that journey myself I can vouch for its difficulty."

Before swallowing the whole mouth full Sully replied, "Alright by me ma'am. I'm used to a lot worse."

"Well!...Well what brings you all this way to our door Mr Sully, certainly not the state of my health?" Elizabeth enquired.

Feeling all eyes riveted on him realizing he had forgotten the reason Michaela had fled from home was to be with her dying mother he swallowed hard and replied. "Tell ya the truth Ma'am I'm glad to see ya doing better." Turning his eyes he looked directly at Michaela, "but that's not why I'm here."

Doctor William Burke had been watching with silent interest at the rough looking intruder. He saw the smouldering eyes that this Sully who seemed to have materialized from Colorado Spring gazed at Michaela. He had hoped to be her suitor and suddenly realized he may have a rival here.

Well, there was only one way to find out though he doubted it. He innocently asked with a raised eye-brow, "Does your business bring you to Boston, sir?"

Remembering his manners and just as intrigued to know this man who sat so comfortably close to Michaela, Sully wiped his hands on the napkin free of food before proffering it towards the man over the table slightly standing, "Ya can call me Sully."

Doctor Burke had not expected this stranger to introduce himself in a civilized way and hesitated, finally taking the hand held out to him. Everyone was watching to see what would happen as the seconds ticked away. Matthew had not liked the Doctor and was having trouble not to yell at him. Suddenly the doctor took Sully's hand reluctantly saying, "Yes, quite forgive me, Doctor William Burke."

Sully was pleased to hear this, thinking he was a colleague of Michaela's and not as he though a bit too comfortable at the family table responding. "Pleased to meet ya." As the man sat again, now even closer to Michaela, Sully's fears rose again more fiercely, he once more concentrated his gaze on her as her cheek colouring rose to a bright pink.

Others at the table had been intrigued at what was happening at the head of the table. The children just wanted their Ma to be nicer to Sully as she seemed to have forgotten his help over the past. She had changed since their arrival and they hardly recognised her since she had been forced to travel to Boston. She had changed into what this town had wanted in less time than a few days. Always emphasizing their manners, their clothes which she had replaced and dining in places that looked like palaces. They barely recognised her anymore as the pioneer doctor.

Marjorie who had always been Michaela's nemesis as a child and could no longer hold her tongue. She had smiled with glee at hearing of Michaela's demise in Colorado Springs, that she was reduced into living in a wooden shack. Animals as patients and this man her mother had called a mountain man as a friend. Feeling she was now throwing in her trump card she asked innocently. "Mother told us he's what is termed was a mountain man...what exactly does a mountain man do? We're all dying to know?"

Rebecca whom Mike had spoken to was thrilled that Mr Sully had come. She felt that if he had made the journey then he must have really liked her sister. Responding with a genuine smile at him suggesting, "Not all of us I suggest we allow Mr Sully to eat his meal in peace," scowling at her middle sister.

Satisfied, the whole table began to eat while Michaela felt a small pang of conscious, suddenly stating to her family who were strangers and didn't know Sully. "Mr Sully is a miner and a carpenter and a hunter. A negotiator between the United States Army and the Cheyenne Indians. And over the course of the past year he has provided me with shelter, often food, and he has saved my life on more than one occasion." She looked at Sully with pride, though the look quickly faded, and if Sully had not been studying her he would have missed the small flicker. He was strangely comforted by Michaela's explanation to these unfamiliar people as he felt like an outsider.

Everyone was stopped by the picture their sister painted of this new man in their midst. The children started to relax seeing their Ma finally comfortable with standing up for Sully against their horrid cousins and their parents.

William stated quickly, "For which you have *my* undying gratitude Mr Sully." Michaela looked at William before looking again briefly at Sully before dropping her gaze to the table. Not looking at him again made Sully uneasy once again. He had heard the emphasis on my from the doctor.

The meal continued and eventually Michaela and Doctor Burke suggested that Elizabeth should retire. Everyone left saying their good-byes at the door and at last Doctor Burke left as well. Sully had sat with the children waiting. Mrs Quinn had offered him a room. When Michaela re-entered the room the children quickly made the excuse to leave for bed, Matthew dragging a reluctant Brian with them saying, "Good night, Ma and Sully."

Both adults responded at the same time. "Good night."

Standing alone at last Michaela felt uncomfortable and moved towards the plushly carpeted stairs, gripping the carved wooden banister for support. "I'll show you to the guest room," She said heading upward. Sully reluctantly followed.

Opening the heavy wood panelled door Michaela entered the room followed swiftly by Sully who closed the door. He was confused by her behaviour, when she had left and they shared their most inner fears and thoughts he felt they had become so close that they were able to feel their love for each other.

Desperately looking around so she did not feel over whelmed, Michaela finally spoke, "I'll ask Harrison to lay a fire for you."

Sully was surprised and took her arm so she had to look at him, "What's wrong with you?" Suddenly he remembered he had asked this same question when she had wanted to adopt the orphans.

Nervous at his touch and his blue penetrating gaze, she uneasily responded. "What do you mean?"

Glancing at the fire place he answered. "I mean I can make a fire, and so can you as I remember."

Staring at each other Sully suddenly let go of her arm, sadly asking. "Aren't ya glad to see me?"

Defensively Michaela answered. "Of course I am...I...I'm just surprised to see you here, that's all."

Quietly he replied. "Ya were gone so long, I...I got worried somethin' mighta happened to ya." He could not go on.

Michaela knew that was not all of what Sully was feeling nor wanted to say. Looking at him she timidly said. "Thank you."

He was like a small boy she wanted to hold when he answered back. "Ya welcome."

Sully had always been looking out for her and he had come all this way out of concern for her. Overcome she looked for a distraction. Spotting the servant call cord near the door she indicated it saying, "If you need anything just ring."

Miserably he nodded and moved away from the door allowing her to pass out of the room. She said. "good night."

Unhappily Sully replied. "Good night."

The finality of the click of the door shutting told him she had gone.

Sinking down his back sliding down the closed door he drew up his knees and folded his arms on them and lowered his head on them. Sadly he wondered how he had become a stranger to her in the time they had been apart. He had been always thinking of her, in his waking and sleep he'd had her on his mind. He had wanted to say. "Let me tell you that I love you and I think about you all the time." Now he wondered if he was in fact too late. Had he been disillusioned thinking she had felt the same? Should he just go back home? Groaning he knew his heart was telling him he wanted his dreams to come true.

The End.


End file.
